Guh. I want to stay a child forever. Like Peter Pan.

:( You know it sucks growing up. Everyone expects you to be responsible for yourself and most if not all of the aspects in your life. Well, news falsh. We're still kids. Our parents still look after us, drive us places, feed us, make sure we take advantage of every oppportuniy possible etc. But seriously?

I thought I knew what I wanted to do when I left school, now I haven't got a scooby. So as I sit here, typing this out, I am tearing my hair out trying to figure out what to do with my life because I have a whole family looking at me. Judging me. All the time. Every desicion. Every wrong move.

Sound weird? I know. They should support me right? Well they do, just not in the right way and sometimes too much. They push me to do the best I can. The whole guilt trip, the whole "You don't want to end up like us" blah blah blah.

I used to love school, but now it's turning out to be a bit of a hassle.Theres the boy you like yet they don't know you exist, or the subject you love but the teacher you've got makes you hate it, or even the fact that the one subject you wanted to make a career of, you've been put off of that aswell because you saw that it's not always fun and games. Not that it ever has been. I know I should have been working but I don't even think i want to persue it anymore. Been put off completely.

Can't wait to get 5th year out of the way. Too much to learn in not enough time. It's no wonder everyone fails. If it wasn't for the pressure from my family and the promise I made to my friends, I'd be gone by now.

Researching colleges and courses for this time next year. Need to decide now. I have no idea what to do and I'm stressing out to the max. I hate it. Think that this is going to be a job for the library the morn.

Wish me luck in my doomed academic career.

Hope you all enjoyed this super depressing post. Just needed to get it off my chest.

Byeeeess

xxxxxxxxxxx

guh.

in the computer room at school and is disgusted at how slow the computers are. its awful tbh :/ and omg my other music teacher frenchie. why does he even bother i mean really. stfu noone cares.

ANYWAY

in music yet again different day of course :) no the listening website and im playing two different operas together and they go together really well. its weird and cool at the same time :L got my bass in today.  still need a name for it :/  any ideas (A) well i shall leave you for a while and write as soon as i can about the visit from the relatives and all of that drama ¬_¬ ohwell

see yaa :)

xxxxx